Some part of me

Everyday, every morning, more than 5 billion of people, wake up with something in their heads; thinking about what are they gonna do today, wich clothes to wear, wich words to say. But what they dont know is that there are some things that may change their day. Some things unplanned, some things that come to surprise some part of their lives, maybe for better, or for worse. Me, for example, im a particular case; i always wake up with something, or even better, with a picture of someone, or some dream im thinking about. And i always imagine that im gonna do something different, or finally im gonna talk to the guy in my class who i suspect hates me for some non sense reason; or that im gonna take some risk and finally lay down my guards and defenses and be the person im supossed to be. But sometimes, it doesnt happen just like that, what im trying to say is that WE can change our days, WE can change the courses of our lives, WE can decide what to do, what to say, even wich clothes to wear, but most important, WE can decide if we´re gonna stand up and make a difference, or sit and look around without doing nothing at all. So, its up to us; its our choices what really make us who we are; and also, its our choices who change our days, lives, and even can change the people who are next to us..for better, or for worse...

Just him...

"Most of our lives are a series of images, they pass us by like towns on a highway. But sometimes a moment stuns us as it happens and we know that this instant is more than a fleeting image. We know that this moment, every part of it, will live on forever."

Lucas Scott

Some crushes and a little smile

so, there´s a guy! yeah, dudes, a guy! he lives near my house, and we ususally talk some stuff, but sometimes, we stare at each other and we feel so speachless, cuz we dont know how to begin a chat again...so, when im on my way to college, sometimes i pass by his place, and when im lucky, i find him, but other times, like always, i never find him, i always talk to his grandma and his aunt or his father instead, and they tell me: he´s not around, or he´s out and i don´t know when he´s coming back...gosh! how i hate that! so, today, just for some strange coincidence, i met up with him and this is just a piece of our usual, common conversation:

Fran: hey! i called to your house, but your mum told me you were out.
Glen: oh! yeah! i was doing some work for college! so how are you?
Fran: good you?
Glen: the same, so, why dont come to my place to talk?
Fran: you go to my place..
(sighs)
Glen: i told you, u´re always welcome there, no one is gonna bite you!
Fran: i know but, go to my place, im gonna tell you something...
Glen: what´s that?
Fran: just go, will ya?
(stare at each other, laugh and the look down)
Fran: so u asked me if i had a gf, so, i dont, what about u?
Glen: nah! i dont, in fact, i made a bet with my best frend and i dared him that no guy will ever confess his feelings for me. they dont have any courage for that.
Fran: is that so? well, im gonna say what they´re afraid to confess...jajajaja!!! will you go to my place?
Glen: i think..what are u gonna tell me eh? you know? im gonna give a hug as a present for ur bday!
Fran: give me something else, something i can appreciate.
Glen: write me a letter, then.
Fran: you´ll see, even though i hate those crap stuff, but im gonna write you something nice!
Glen: sweet!!!! so, i have to go, so, see you at 4pm or 5pm maybe?
Fran: yeah, i´ll wait for you and bring some chocolate!
Glen: oi!!! you´ll have to earn it mister!!!

Just to remember something..

"There are moments in our lives when we find ourselves at a crossroad, afraid, confused, without a roadmap. The choices we make in those moments can define the rest of our days. Of course when faced with the unknown, most of us prefer to turn around and go back."

Lucas Scott

Agua Sexual

Rodando a goterones solos,
a gotas como dientes,
a espesos goterones de mermelada y sangre,
rodando a goterones,
cae el agua,
como una espada en gotas,
como un desgarrador río de vidrio,
cae mordiendo,
golpeando el eje de la simetría, pegando en las costuras del
alma,
rompiendo cosas abandonadas, empapando lo oscuro.

Solamente es un soplo, más húmedo que el llanto,
un líquido, un sudor, un aceite sin nombre,
un movimiento agudo,
haciéndose, espesándose,
cae el agua,
a goterones lentos,
hacia su mar, hacia su seco océano,
hacia su ola sin agua.

Veo el verano extenso, y un estertor saliendo de un granero,
bodegas, cigarras,
poblaciones, estímulos,
habitaciones, niñas
durmiendo con las manos en el corazón,
soñando con bandidos, con incendios,
veo barcos,
veo árboles de médula
erizados como gatos rabiosos,
veo sangre, puñales y medias de mujer,
y pelos de hombre,
veo camas, veo corredores donde grita una virgen,
veo frazadas y órganos y hoteles.

Veo los sueños sigilosos,
admito los postreros días,
y también los orígenes, y también los recuerdos,
como un párpado atrozmente levantado a la fuerza
estoy mirando.

Y entonces hay este sonido:
un ruido rojo de huesos,
un pegarse de carne,
y piernas amarillas como espigas juntándose.
Yo escucho entre el disparo de los besos,
escucho, sacudido entre respiraciones y sollozos.

Estoy mirando, oyendo,
con la mitad del alma en el mar y la mitad del alma
en la tierra,
y con las dos mitades del alma miro al mundo.

y aunque cierre los ojos y me cubra el corazón enteramente,
veo caer un agua sorda,
a goterones sordos.
Es como un huracán de gelatina,
como una catarata de espermas y medusas.
Veo correr un arco iris turbio.
Veo pasar sus aguas a través de los huesos.

Pablo Neruda

Let´s make love under the rain

so this week´s been crazier than ever; teachers don´t show up, sometimes there´s no class to attend, and we can be free as we wish!!! but college is getting to its limit and soon i´ll fly to Florida, so i can buy some stuff, like a polaroid, a BB, some dresses, flats, but i wanna ask you, what do u think i should buy in Florida?? It´ll be great if u advice me in some stuff, im pretty bad at this... =)

by other hand, i´d like falling inlove, isn´t it great? i mean, at right time, of curz, but i wanna feel that; wanna smile even there´s nothing on my mind, i wanna feel that in my heart and kiss that person, and have the guts to tell him: "i luv you more than anything".... and be able not to show pride and hide something(im pretty good at it, though), cuz im not the kind of person who says, like i have a bf, or im inluv with something, i keep that for myself....but i think when that person comes, all my shields and armor will fall down this time and once for all, i can say those 3 words...

Aqui te amo

Aquí te amo.
En los oscuros pinos se desenreda el viento.
Fosforece la luna sobre las aguas errantes.
Andan días iguales persiguiéndose.

Se desciñe la niebla en danzantes figuras.
Una gaviota de plata se descuelga del ocaso.
A veces una vela. Altas, altas estrellas.

O la cruz negra de un barco. Solo.
A veces amanezco, y hasta mi alma está húmeda.
Suena, resuena el mar lejano.
Este es un puerto.
Aquí te amo.

Aquí te amo y en vano te oculta el horizonte.
Te estoy amando aún entre estas frías cosas.
A veces van mis besos en esos barcos graves,
que corren por el mar hacia donde no llegan.

Ya me veo olvidado como estas viejas anclas.
Son más tristes los muelles cuando atraca la tarde.
Se fatiga mi vida inútilmente hambrienta.
Amo lo que no tengo. Estás tú tan distante.

Mi hastío forcejea con los lentos crepúsculos.
Pero la noche llega y comienza a cantarme.
La luna hace girar su rodaje de sueño.

Me miran con tus ojos las estrellas más grandes.
Y, como yo te amo, los pinos en el viento
Quieren cantar tu nombre con sus hojas de alambre.

Pablo Neruda