What the fuck, dude??? SERIOUSLY!!!!

Ok, we didnt talk like we planned, but i heard something funny about this guy! He said to a frend of mine who told me of curz, that i was looking after him, i mean, that i liked him and stuff!!! O sea!!!!! y eto pol Dios??? Viejo, si te he dado una señal que te hizo pensar que yo estaba por ti y vaina, oye lo siento, en serio, but i like to talk to guys more than to girls, but that doesnt mean that i wanna be with one of them!!! Seriously!!!! cuando mi pana me lo dijo, yo hice cara de WTF??!! claro! porque a veces suelo confundir a la gente, y creen que eso es en serio o algo asi...diale! me gustaria ser en realidad mala mala!!! porque de esa forma, dejan la m**** confusion, y dejan la vaina de creerse tooo la vaina!!!! A veces, los hombres suelen ser idiotas o que??? yo quiero que alguien no se deje confiar de mi tan facil, alguien que haga que yo tenga que ponerme nerviosa, un tipo asi quiero yo!!! no alguien asi!!!! Gosh!!!! hate this crap!!!!

Busted!!!!

Last night, i talked to the guy, and we were talking some shit by the way, like nothing too much serious...so, i was thinking to set him up to make him confess about his feelings, or me suspecting about him...anywayz, i started saying that there was someone who i think he likes me, but wont say a word, unless i made him confess by setting him a trap. He was listening very quietly and very serious and funny at the same time! and then i told him that i was planning something like a tricky question, or trying to make him tell me, and he asked if he knew that person and if he could help me with some advices so i could success. I rejected his help and said i was gonna do it on my own..and then, he said: ''You're talking about me, right? i'm the guy u're gonna set up right?'' and i was like shit!!!! crap!!!! dammit!!! so, then i was laughing off and i wasnt embarrased or anything, didnt feel any stupid butterflies or my heart beating too fast or sweating or my ears get hotter, or blushing..he, on the other hand, was turning red and was laughing and he was like mumbling stuff and trying to give me examples and saying that he didnt wanna have something serious for the moment, but also was saying if you say yes..and i asked ''Fran, you like me dont ya?'' and he said ''Geez, dude! you're soo direct!!'' i mean, i have a pretty bad habit, and its when i know a guy likes me, i make him say it, with questions or being kinda too nice(wich i hate by the way), and know after all that he said like yeah i like you, you're very pretty and nice and i like you, and i just laughed..and then, after saying goodbye, he told me that we were gonna talk about it...

PD: im gonna say what i think as well...

Some part of me

Everyday, every morning, more than 5 billion of people, wake up with something in their heads; thinking about what are they gonna do today, wich clothes to wear, wich words to say. But what they dont know is that there are some things that may change their day. Some things unplanned, some things that come to surprise some part of their lives, maybe for better, or for worse. Me, for example, im a particular case; i always wake up with something, or even better, with a picture of someone, or some dream im thinking about. And i always imagine that im gonna do something different, or finally im gonna talk to the guy in my class who i suspect hates me for some non sense reason; or that im gonna take some risk and finally lay down my guards and defenses and be the person im supossed to be. But sometimes, it doesnt happen just like that, what im trying to say is that WE can change our days, WE can change the courses of our lives, WE can decide what to do, what to say, even wich clothes to wear, but most important, WE can decide if we´re gonna stand up and make a difference, or sit and look around without doing nothing at all. So, its up to us; its our choices what really make us who we are; and also, its our choices who change our days, lives, and even can change the people who are next to us..for better, or for worse...

Just him...

"Most of our lives are a series of images, they pass us by like towns on a highway. But sometimes a moment stuns us as it happens and we know that this instant is more than a fleeting image. We know that this moment, every part of it, will live on forever."

Lucas Scott

Some crushes and a little smile

so, there´s a guy! yeah, dudes, a guy! he lives near my house, and we ususally talk some stuff, but sometimes, we stare at each other and we feel so speachless, cuz we dont know how to begin a chat again...so, when im on my way to college, sometimes i pass by his place, and when im lucky, i find him, but other times, like always, i never find him, i always talk to his grandma and his aunt or his father instead, and they tell me: he´s not around, or he´s out and i don´t know when he´s coming back...gosh! how i hate that! so, today, just for some strange coincidence, i met up with him and this is just a piece of our usual, common conversation:

Fran: hey! i called to your house, but your mum told me you were out.
Glen: oh! yeah! i was doing some work for college! so how are you?
Fran: good you?
Glen: the same, so, why dont come to my place to talk?
Fran: you go to my place..
(sighs)
Glen: i told you, u´re always welcome there, no one is gonna bite you!
Fran: i know but, go to my place, im gonna tell you something...
Glen: what´s that?
Fran: just go, will ya?
(stare at each other, laugh and the look down)
Fran: so u asked me if i had a gf, so, i dont, what about u?
Glen: nah! i dont, in fact, i made a bet with my best frend and i dared him that no guy will ever confess his feelings for me. they dont have any courage for that.
Fran: is that so? well, im gonna say what they´re afraid to confess...jajajaja!!! will you go to my place?
Glen: i think..what are u gonna tell me eh? you know? im gonna give a hug as a present for ur bday!
Fran: give me something else, something i can appreciate.
Glen: write me a letter, then.
Fran: you´ll see, even though i hate those crap stuff, but im gonna write you something nice!
Glen: sweet!!!! so, i have to go, so, see you at 4pm or 5pm maybe?
Fran: yeah, i´ll wait for you and bring some chocolate!
Glen: oi!!! you´ll have to earn it mister!!!

Just to remember something..

"There are moments in our lives when we find ourselves at a crossroad, afraid, confused, without a roadmap. The choices we make in those moments can define the rest of our days. Of course when faced with the unknown, most of us prefer to turn around and go back."

Lucas Scott

Agua Sexual

Rodando a goterones solos,
a gotas como dientes,
a espesos goterones de mermelada y sangre,
rodando a goterones,
cae el agua,
como una espada en gotas,
como un desgarrador río de vidrio,
cae mordiendo,
golpeando el eje de la simetría, pegando en las costuras del
alma,
rompiendo cosas abandonadas, empapando lo oscuro.

Solamente es un soplo, más húmedo que el llanto,
un líquido, un sudor, un aceite sin nombre,
un movimiento agudo,
haciéndose, espesándose,
cae el agua,
a goterones lentos,
hacia su mar, hacia su seco océano,
hacia su ola sin agua.

Veo el verano extenso, y un estertor saliendo de un granero,
bodegas, cigarras,
poblaciones, estímulos,
habitaciones, niñas
durmiendo con las manos en el corazón,
soñando con bandidos, con incendios,
veo barcos,
veo árboles de médula
erizados como gatos rabiosos,
veo sangre, puñales y medias de mujer,
y pelos de hombre,
veo camas, veo corredores donde grita una virgen,
veo frazadas y órganos y hoteles.

Veo los sueños sigilosos,
admito los postreros días,
y también los orígenes, y también los recuerdos,
como un párpado atrozmente levantado a la fuerza
estoy mirando.

Y entonces hay este sonido:
un ruido rojo de huesos,
un pegarse de carne,
y piernas amarillas como espigas juntándose.
Yo escucho entre el disparo de los besos,
escucho, sacudido entre respiraciones y sollozos.

Estoy mirando, oyendo,
con la mitad del alma en el mar y la mitad del alma
en la tierra,
y con las dos mitades del alma miro al mundo.

y aunque cierre los ojos y me cubra el corazón enteramente,
veo caer un agua sorda,
a goterones sordos.
Es como un huracán de gelatina,
como una catarata de espermas y medusas.
Veo correr un arco iris turbio.
Veo pasar sus aguas a través de los huesos.

Pablo Neruda